Correct and effective
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Think about the last time you face situations where you have to stand up for yourself, asking for what you need. For women, speaking out of their needs, their true desires are often more difficult than men. In the eyes of society, we have become accustomed to looking at virtues like meekness and patience. This may have long-term consequences, from poor relationships to a less-promoted, less career.
CHECK WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW THESE FOLLOWING CARDS?
1. Too careful in the request
We often make the question lighter with words like "perhaps", "wish" instead of "I need", "I want". This makes your sentence seem more audible but can also cause "ambiguity" between suggestions or suggestions, so listeners can take it less seriously.
2. Ask instead of stating
Be careful when translating your statement into a question like "Is that color great, isn't it?" or "do you think we should try a little with that item?". Such kinds of things make your intentions become unclear. People may understand that you are asking and do not hesitate to give the opposite answer to what you want.
3. Reluctantly accept
When you encounter an answer that is contrary to what you want, some people immediately "give up". However, your self-awareness of the answer may not be accurate. If you encounter such an answer, it is important to repeat your wishes and ask for compromises. In fact, everyone in general is perfectly comfortable with a healthy compromise.
4. Don't know how to control language, gestures
You can make a statement that is not disappointing, but see if your eyes and gestures say anything else.
According to statistics: only about 23% of the value of your speech lies in the message. The remaining 70% is in voice, gesture, eyes and surely the listener is watching you very carefully. The facial expressions, the habit of snoring, restlessness like twisting your hands, biting your nails will "tell you" that what you are saying is not what you really want.
HOW DO I REMOVE?
1. Find out what you want and why?
Knowing your needs and wants, their importance makes you produce positive results. Evaluate the needs of others and try to think about the method that can work both sides.
2. Foresee possible answers
This is easier if you listen to the listener. Plan a series of answers you can get and eliminate each one. Prepare carefully for each case, how will you say it, how to do it. This helps you avoid falling into a sudden and passive situation.
3. Relax
Usually we overestimate the negative ability. This creates fear and makes it harder to say what you want. In fact, the worst thing that can happen is when your request is rejected and then, we find another way, that's all.
4. Speak up the request
Once you repeat and relax, what are you waiting for without going to the "audience" and saying your wishes?
5. Review
When your exchange is complete, take some time to review, learn from the experience next time. Let's see if it can be better, where did you succeed? Don't torture yourself if the results don't work out as you want. Instead, look for other ways to fulfill your wishes.
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